Figure

Naiinis ako.

Everything seems to be not going the right way.

Naiinis ako sa Geol prof ko. he is supposed to give out points to those who recites in class. yes he gives points to some people, pero bakit pag ako na yung magrerecite, hindi sya nagbibigay ng points? eh lagi naman ako nagrerecite at lagi namang tama ung nirerecite ko, pero hindi nya ko binibigyan ng points. it's unfair...

tapos naiinis din ako sa isang execommer. lagi nya ko inuutusan, hello? kanina, ang utos naman nya sakin ay maglinis ng tambayan.. huh? apparently tingin nya ako lang ang nagiisang member ng secretariat committee kaya ako lang inuutusan nya. eh hello? ni hindi ko nga sya head eh, bakit ko sya susundin. tapos hindi lang naman ako ang seccom sa ecosoc eh, ni hindi nga ako vice chair, so why should i do such stuff? at eto pa, i personally think ang paglilinis ng tambayan ay hindi ginagawa habang marami pang tao sa loob. kasi pag nilinis mo yun ng ganun, magdudumi lang ult... urgh, do i have to expound more of the stupid stuff?

hindi na, malaki ka na marjorie, magisip ka.

grrr...

naiinis din ako sa mga taong plan ng plan hindi naman natutuloy ung mga pinaplano. mga paasa. kakainis.

and because of that, my sense of christmas is bleak.

this is what people call merry christmas.

Figure

Naiinis ako.

Everything seems to be not going the right way.

Naiinis ako sa Geol prof ko. he is supposed to give out points to those who recites in class. yes he gives points to some people, pero bakit pag ako na yung magrerecite, hindi sya nagbibigay ng points? eh lagi naman ako nagrerecite at lagi namang tama ung nirerecite ko, pero hindi nya ko binibigyan ng points. it's unfair...

tapos naiinis din ako sa isang execommer. lagi nya ko inuutusan, hello? kanina, ang utos naman nya sakin ay maglinis ng tambayan.. huh? apparently tingin nya ako lang ang nagiisang member ng secretariat committee kaya ako lang inuutusan nya. eh hello? ni hindi ko nga sya head eh, bakit ko sya susundin. tapos hindi lang naman ako ang seccom sa ecosoc eh, ni hindi nga ako vice chair, so why should i do such stuff? at eto pa, i personally think ang paglilinis ng tambayan ay hindi ginagawa habang marami pang tao sa loob. kasi pag nilinis mo yun ng ganun, magdudumi lang ult... urgh, do i have to expound more of the stupid stuff?

hindi na, malaki ka na marjorie, magisip ka.

grrr...

naiinis din ako sa mga taong plan ng plan hindi naman natutuloy ung mga pinaplano. mga paasa. kakainis.

and because of that, my sense of christmas is bleak.

this is what people call merry christmas.

Friends

im being too selfless. if i continue attending to the needs of others, if i continue reducing my ego to a whit, i will be a no one. and everything that had passed by my eyes, all the beauty i see in this world that most people dont recognize, will be lost forever.

tomorrow i will be a pain in the ass.

it's my turn to kill the joy. watch how i do it.

"tribute??"

kiss my ass. the only purpose of this cheese is to monumentalize your shining moments... YOUR petty hardships. sorry to say, your dear boy with a big heart wont participate in this hell of a phony picnic. big boy with a big heart is tired appreciating everything that never reciprocates. im human too you know.

someone asked me a while ago how to do the problem set in econ106. well...

figure it out yourself, smartass. last time we were doing another problem set, i had to fend for myself, figuring out the workings of each complex equation. now you figure it out yourself.

another someone blocked me out totally when i was speaking and the darn talked to someone else, apparently not minding the things i say. since when did my opinions not matter? well you think im a nonsense huh? dont ever come back to me when you feel like spice is lacking in your dull fuckin constrained life. too bad for you, you've never seen a beach before.

then another person called, asking me for some help in the same problem set. hey. look who's asking for help! the same person who blocked me out the last time we did the exercises in 106. and as always, you have blocked me out, treated me like some ignoramus who failed by your academic and intellectual standards. no, little miss brat, i wont teach you anything. and i didnt mean brat the cute one, i meant it like you're trash. brat. a bitch of nature, selfish when the going gets tough.

wow, it feels good back-biting. it's liberating.

-angry still-

Jejo2

AAAAAGGGGHHHH!!!

Putang inang Jejo yan! Putang Ina sya!!

shet... bkt ba gusto nya sya na lang lagi masusunod?? parang wala na kong say sa mga ginagawa namin dito sa bahay ah!

putang ina mo!

dapat kas mag-go-grocery kmi kahapon. sabi nya bukas na lng daw (ngaun) kasi wla pa syang pera. tapos kanikanina lang, tumawag ako sa kanya, sabi ko grocery na kami, aba sabi:

"Di ba sabi ko bukas na lang, hindi pa ko nagpapadeposit ng pera eh..."

Pucha naman. Ikaw na lang ba lagi masusunod?

Tapos i have this inkling feeling pa na sirang sira ako sa kanila kasi dinodominate ko ung unit. eh pucha. di ikaw na!

tapos ako pa lagi ung bumibili ng mineral water para inumin, nakikiinom din naman sya, pero ako lng nagbabayad! eh fuck!

tska ung paghuhugas ng pinggan, putek, ang huhugasan lng nun eh ung kinainan nya, hindi nya isasama ung iba na ginamit ko before kami magmeal, o kaya eh ung kawaling pinaglutuan... sasabihin ko pa na hugasan nya, hindi marunong magkusa! Putang ina mo, pag ako naghuhugas, hinuhugasan ko lahat! tangina, ako pa minsan nagwawalis at nagpupunas ng sahig, tapos bigla kang dadating, kasama ung dakila mong girlfriend, tapos anu na, wala na ung pinakintab kong sahig! tangina mo! tska bakit ba lagi mo dinadala yang girlfriend mo sa unit?? nagdadala ba ako ng bisita? once in a blue moon chong.

tska fuck, ang dalas mo magdala ng bisita dito! anu ginagawa nyo, NAG-IINUMAN! Eh puta, andito ko, bahay ko din to, kalahati ng bayad dito, akin! Tangina, syempre pag dinadala mo mga friends mo dito, ano option ko! eh di out of place! fuck san ka nakakita nun, sariling bahay, OP ka... dito lang! Tangina mo.

Tska ang kalat-kalat mo, hindi ka ba marunong maglinis? tingnan mo nga ung unit! mostly ung mga bagay na nakakalat, mga gamit mo! mag-ayus ka nga!

Pucha naman oh. alam mo nagpipigil lng ako sau eh. alam kong mejo mahirap katayuan mo kasi wala ka nang magulang tapos walang nagtutustos sa mga panggastos mo, pero sana mas sensitive ka naman, nakakalalake ka na eh!

Pucha pag ako napuno...

alam mo bang guntik ko na mapatay kapatid ko dahil sa galit ko sa kanya??

Leagues

do i love or do i not?

today is my last day here at the shop. i haven't told neri and leng yet because i want today to be normal. i don't want to attract some special treatment or whatever.

so it's goodbye again as always. for a month i've tasted the bittersweet flavor of business. school starts in four days, and i havent braced myself yet. im starting to believe that i've reached that "degree of knowingness" (from socio10) that would make it hard for me to further educate myself. im working at 18, what else could better that?? then im starting to think about the corporate worlds of Makati and New York, where bright minds clash to get themselves to business. they wouldn't be there if they're not educated enough. so goes my random mind, having to convince myself that i need, in spite of my lack of will, to go to school.

i wonder if i'd ever be the same - treating education like it's ambrosia. i wonder if id still have a special treatment to education and everything that comes with it: the university, the teachers, the atmosphere, the PEERS... i've started thinking that id fit better with an "older" society. i cant jive harmoniously with my peers. i think everyone knew that.

and i wouldn't even want to go back to school, having met reality personified by **** *** ****. i fell in love with work, with the atmosphere, and with my co-workers. and the life here in lipa is just one of those experiences that i consider most educational of all.

oh... * **** ** **** **** *****. why does it have to be always a bit tragic for me? i'll be leaving in four days. so soon to depart. haha, i didn't know sembreak flings happen in real life.

how will i perceive UP now? when i was fresh from high school, i thought UP was bustling with life. what would it be now? i dont feel like failing in my subjects because of thinking about this all but, is it really right to study when your heart is not in it?

i doubt that the people i've been with in UP would ever make me happy again. i feel like we're in different leagues now, and im on my own in the dismal world i've created within myself.

pero sige, sakay na lang. * **** **** * ***** **** ** ***** **** ***.

plato help me.

-doubt-

Vida

FUCKIN BIATCH!!

Fucking biatch is so bitchy... yester yesterday, kada ate lunch at vinzon's. blahblah. after having lunch, we were talking, and tin was like doing something to her hair. i told her to wear pigtails haha lah, and i also told her that if she had longer hair she could wear some dog-ears... then vida corrected me in front of everybody while laughing out at me, saying that there is no such thing as dog ears. well fuck her!!

i was told by someone from my highschool that when you do pigtails on very long hair, they're called dog ears. vida is so inconsiderate, she used to laugh at me when i commit mistakes as if she's know-all lah. hello.

and oh, vida is the noisiest bitch i've ever been seatmates to. she's like always making side comments to everything in our socio10 class, and she's always angry at the freshmen just because they've outdone her and she's not standing out in class. hello. how will she stand out when she's making a notepad out of me by telling me all her side comments. bitch. now she's limited. good thing she doesn't talk that much now. finally i can focus on my socio10 class.

ayen was right. vida is the noisiest bitch on the land.

Life

Dammit!!

My granny is so suffering...

I lost my nurse!!

Who's next??

Dammit!!

Francis

Argh!! Mr. Ariosa from our volleyball class is so infuriating!! He's getting into my nerves.

He towers above all of us at past 6 feet, he is also from the School of Econ, and he speaks Chavacano... But damn! He uses his God-given culture to boss around and play as if he'd been in the varsity for the longest time... He keeps on telling everyone our faults, our mistakes, our fouls, pero I got to observe him a while ago, and, in my own terms, he's fouler! He stinks playing Volleyball!!

He keeps on making a double hit on the first ball (although it's acceptable, you can't do that all the time) He always hits the ball agad, but in my calculations, only 2 of his 15 attempts to smash got over the net and made it to our court. 5 made it over the side lines, 1 over the endline... See??

He's such an airy bull... That butch, I'm gonna smash a ball to him once! The lower the better! Because he thinks high, that tall stick can't surely bend his way down...

Go me!!